Picture: ‘Hey look at me! I’m over 40, dress like a teenager, swear and yell, yet people don’t seem to take me seriously. It’s not fair!

African-American cultural mis-appropriater Eminem has, according to the tabloids, reignited his feud with President Trump. Since when was President Trump in a feud with this wigger? This has been totally one-sided, with Eminem – who has jumped the shark on his illustrious rap career – almost begging for attention from the President. Eminem seems so desperate to cut into Trump’s domination of popular culture – just to boost his fading star – repeatedly bad-mouthing him on stage and now rapping about him on his new surprise album. (I believe ‘surprise album’ is a music industry euphemism for ‘No point marketing this piece of shit’.) The best part of Eminem stomping his feet like the Napoleon-complex angry half-ling that he is, is that Trump ignores his cries for attention, which must really eat into his massive ego. Stick to what you’re good at Marhsall, flagrantly ripping off black culture without any reparations for your theft.